Beards, Beer, Beyonce, String Theory, and Coincidences. Why?

"Justin T. Westbrook" (justintylerwestbrook)
11/24/2014 at 00:13 • Filed to: TL:DR, Coincidences, Oddities, Why, String Theory, Weird, Oppo

Sitting here trying not to shit myself.

Coincidence #1: I decided to be a good son this weekend and go with my dad to a local brewery. My dad has just started getting into the #Brewlopnik crowd and was meeting some military buddies that live up near the brewery. Long story short I actually had fun, and the waiter had an awesome beard. That part is important. The beard. Later yesterday, I went back into town to go see Mockingjay with a friend, and I shit you not the guy in line in front of us, DIRECTLY IN FRONT of us, is the awesome bearded waiter from the brewery. I say 'sup and he said 'sup and then I shrugged off the coincidence.

Coincidence #2: Sitting in the car last night, coming home from saying 'sup to the beard guy and seeing Mockingjay, listening to a Beyonce song. Don't judge me, but I was trying to use an app to see what the name was, and the app wasn't coming up with any results. I know it's a really popular, older song. I decided to go through all the songs similar to it that I knew in my head, and one of them was Independent Woman, which isn't a Beyonce song but I thought at least the title sounded like one. 2 minutes later, the song finished and I change the radio station, I shit you naught, at the exact moment Kelly Clarkson's Independent Woman starts playing on a 'mix' station. I just smiled at the absurdity of it, and sang my little 5'6" 21 yr old male's heart out.

Coincidence #3: Earlier today while closing up the Jimmy John's, me and my (high school age) friends were discussing whether or not any dimension beyond the fourth, which is time, are legitimate. My friend goes into multiple theories of how there's multiple universes with the possibility of different dimensions. He mentions, by name, the String Theory. I get home, forget about my lame high school co-workers, start watching Episode 3 of Season 2 of The West Wing, a 10 year old show that is now streaming on Netflix revolving around the executive branch of the US government, and there's a 5 minute scene discussing String Theory.

What is happening?

Why is it happening?

Is it happening to anybody else?

Can I control it/take advantage of it?

Is the fourth dimension fucking with me? Is my third dimension self getting messed with by the fourth dimension? Or mocked by all the other dimensions I don't believe are possible?! I'll have to consult one of my high school co-workers for advice.

In all honesty, I am a little freaked out. Thanks for reading. Hope you laughed, but this stuff is seriously getting weird.

DISCUSSION (20)

Conan > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 00:28

Kinja'd!!!

For Sweden > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 00:32

Remove String Theory! Remove String Theory! Modified Newtonian Dynamics Best Theory!

d00mZ > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 00:35

GO BUY A LOTTERY TICKET OR SCRATCHER.

Justin T. Westbrook > d00mZ
11/24/2014 at 00:40

Well I lost in fantasy football, so I dunno.

Justin T. Westbrook > For Sweden
11/24/2014 at 00:41

I don't quite get this so it gets a star.

midengineer > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 00:42

Watch a movie about someone winning the lotto then play the lottery.

Justin T. Westbrook > For Sweden
11/24/2014 at 00:43

The fact that because of you I just learned about a 'missing mass problem' in the standard model of Newtonian physics, I want my star back.

Justin T. Westbrook > midengineer
11/24/2014 at 00:49

I think to meet the standard model of what is occurring specifically to me, let's call it "Dimensional Confusion Whiplash", from what I have observed so far, I would need to win the lottery then randomly watch a movie in which someone wins the lottery. I'm not convinced I have any power to control this, but perhaps it is worth a shot.

d00mZ > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 00:50

AH bummer. Same here. Anyways I'm not going to lie here, but I had some crazy shit like this happen too. I usually shrug it off but it gets interesting once you start catching on to it. Sometimes, I randomly think about something out of the blue, then a few hours later ill either hear it or see it.

Justin T. Westbrook > d00mZ
11/24/2014 at 00:54

I kind of love it. My mom has always claimed to have some sort of coincidental 6th sense. I one time broke my ankle in the back yard (I was playing with the dogs, leg twisted in a hole). I didn't call out for help or anything. Sort of in quasi-shock, I just started crawling towards the house and I was going to call up to her when I got in. She says she swears she heard me screaming her name, and before I even got inside she was already rushing out to me.

She definitely didn't see me, because from the living room, the porch blocks any view of where I was, and I definitely didn't shout, because my sister didn't hear anything.

Weird.

The Magic Rev Matching 4Runner > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 01:11

Jesus, keep your voice down!! Clearly an extra-terrestrial entity is trying to guide you in your life, with his superior all-knowing retrospect from the future.

I believe it is trying to get you to open a brew pub with beard dude... It will be a pretty good little brewery, you'll play a mix of Mockingjay and Kelly Clarkson, but NO Beyonce. This place will be called the Beerth Dimension, and your flagship brew will be the String Theory IPA (cause the world really needs another IPA...). Now this is where your Jimmy Johns buddies come in. This pub is to be the gateway between all (infinite.) dimensions. They will guard the gateway so its powers do not betray the collective beings of the universes. To use said gateway they will have to prepare the being who is to be transported by giving him the Launch System Deploy (LSD for short) order. Then said being will be transported to the West Wing of the desired governing body of the desired universe of the desired dimension.

So to answer your questions.

1. I just did.

2. Nnnoooobodddddyyyy knnnnoowwwwwssss.

3. Not until you fulfill the prophesy I have set forth.

4. Yes. But don't tell them I told you so.

Good luck, young grasshopper.

Justin T. Westbrook > The Magic Rev Matching 4Runner
11/24/2014 at 01:21

You're hired. Whatever it is, you.

Perhaps the beer beard guy is a traveler, or "walker" of the fourth dimension, and the first two coincidences were warning signs by other '4th walkers' to alert me to his presence and my inevitable double contact with him. Perhaps once I recognized him at the premier of the future-set film Mockingjay Hunger Games, which is actually telling a live account of events happening to the other "walkers" in the future, the walkers were attempting to keep me from contacting him, and I've failed! I said 'sup. And now a rift in space and time between the fourth and third dimensions is opening, and a new reality is upon us in which Katniss Everdeen, still played by Jennifer Lawrence, must mate with me in order to reverse the time rift and allow me an opportunity to avoid contact with the estranged 4th walker at the theater! I must travel a far 28 miles into Aberdeen (which sort of rhymes with EVERDEEN!!!?!!!1!!) to return to the brewery, meet Katniss, and fulfill the prophecy!

d00mZ > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 01:29

FUCKING NUTS. When you have kids, you're the great example of a superhero. Keep on coincidentin'!

For Sweden > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 01:43

You star IS the missing mass!

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 01:54

I love all of the theories popping up in this thread. I think you might be onto something with the time rift mate with jlaw thing. SR20 is mandatory.

But really, to answer [loosely] your questions:

1. Coincidences. Or to be more specific, coincidental anomalies within the confines of human perception regarding the finite limitations of the fourth dimension.

2. Because racecar. Oh wait, because coincidences.

3. Frequently in my line of work a certain job well often pop up in clusters after a long absence. For example: I haven't done pneumatic seat bladders in an S-Class in maybe a year, so I will probably have a dozen to do this week. Or, a few weeks ago I did maybe 7 or 8 chain tensioner jobs after having not seen that job in 6 months.

4. Kind of. If you buy an odd or uncommon car, you will start seeing others of its kind everywhere. If you were to buy a Diablo you would probably see 10 people DD'ing them over the next couple of weeks. Unfortunately, my ability to manipulate this anomaly does not extend beyond transportation, so mating with jlaw once does not mean it will happen again, or with anyone else within the general vicinity of that moment in the fourth dimension. I do hope you can expand on my knowledge, and perhaps even prove me wrong.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 02:01

I have another coincidence for you. You're talking a lot about beards, well I just started growing one again after not having one in over 5 years. And there's a lot of beer in my fridge, which is very unusual because I normally don't keep it in my house and only drink at a bar.

The Magic Rev Matching 4Runner > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 02:03

Here is your training video:

Enter with your adblock ready!

Donnie Darko shall show you the way...

Justin T. Westbrook > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
11/24/2014 at 02:19

Uhh.. my Tinder dating app 'matches' always come in groups of four or more, or dry spells of weeks.

Justin T. Westbrook > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
11/24/2014 at 02:21

Do you secretly enjoy Beyonce and Kelly Clarkson?

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Justin T. Westbrook
11/24/2014 at 02:38

Not even remotely. But I'm sure I could find someone who does.